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Me crushing all of the trackz. Again.


Hey yo Hammel!
Yo, what it iz?
You know ain't nobody on your level, right?
Heh, no doubt!
Muhhfuckaz ain't spittin' with you!
Oh, hell no.
That's why we gotz to jack 'em for their beatz, you know what I'm sayin'?
Word up.
So look here: I'ma give you five minutez to show theze niggaz who the fuck you iz, aiight?
Go 'head and body that shit, mayne!

Uno, T-W-O...
Who told you hoez you could uze a few flowz
From you know who?
I suplex you pinche putoz
Get sumo-slammed, hundred-hand slapped
Smacked up and that'z that
I do my trackz inside the U-boat
Too deep for you dopez

Shake it fast, make the cash
Let me spank that ass
Take it off, make it pop
Drop it like it'z hot
Girlie go, work the pole
Horizontal, vertical
All around, up and down
Baby, scrub the ground

Okay, now I'm ready to roll (ooooooh)
The tempo got me revvin' to go (ahhhhhh)
Electro, it'z inevitable
Depeche Mode get me sweatin' fa sho
Hot to death yo, check my dress code
Fresh gold chain, I'm ill az strep throat
Shine on my neck so bright
It make my whole head glow more than Destro
UFO-type hoez on my testiclez
Nymphoz... tig ol' bittiez
Mmmm... this thing haz potential
Oh… best not forget Crow
He locked on with that infra-red scope
So if yo' ass ain't movin' yet, so long
You 'bout to explode!

God damn, Sneak! Slow your roll mayne, let these niggaz' brainz catch up!
Aiight... hit me...

Heh... Let'z get down to brass tackz
Theze rapz danger az haz-matz
So don't think just 'cauze Double-H make you dance
That he won't clap gatz, brrrap brrrap!
I tear rapperz brand new asscrackz
Take 'em to school like backpackz
'cauze their rhymez iz wack, and minez iz jam-packed
With mad punchlinez and laugh trackz
I stack cash like flapjackz
More scratch than a nasty bad rash
Y'all playin' grab-ass with frickin' Lance Bass
I'm backstage gettin' a lap dance
Act fast, suppliez can't last much longer, ma
She got my flag at half-mast
Shawty catch a nad-blast
Hey yo H! What up, fam?
Pull up your damn pantz!

No! Never!
Shut up! Shut uuuuuuuup!

Heh... yeah... fat chance!
Shit gettin' hot az Backdraft
So don't test me, stick with lab ratz
I'm spittin' fresh Saran [W]rapz
Spreadin' verbal anthrax
Through CDz and Sneaky'z Bandcamp
Xanax, crazy barz
Heat for the street, on theze beatz I'm Mad Max
Black glovez, black mask...
Creep in that hooptie hatchback
Uzi in the Gucci knapsack
Mac in my lap, #ipackstrapz
And Glad bagz for theze
Trash MC'z on that stupid swag crap
The sad fact iz theze dudez iz pussy
They need rapper Tampax

'cauze they ain't sneaky like me
Your boy iz Beastie, ask Mike D
I laid down more trackz than Chineze
Somebody find me a nice breeze
'Cauze I be too hot, too bad you not
I burn up your boombox
Stay high az rooftopz and freakin' moon rockz
Drop some 2Pac

We goin' platinum, nigga, we goin' platinum!

Y'all scared... and it don't come az no surprize
Got you shakin' in your bootz... lemme show you why
'Cauze when Sneaky get to kickin' like Cobra Kai
Fuck around, give you more than a swollen eye
Wanna battle?
Better run out to the store and buy
Some better lyricz and a flow before you try
To roll the dice with a general, soldier I...
Will light you up like the sky on 4 July
Y'all could bury me alive in a hole to die
But I reanimate and rize up overnight
Like Mumm-ra, with [w]rapz and immortal life
Demonized, you be haunted by a poltergeist
Oh my... this guy shouldn't hold a mic
Said he knowed how to rhyme... but he told a lie
Meanwhile I got hiz main biatch open wide
Do the math, I'ma teach her how to multiply

Walk in the door, shorty hit the floor
She ain't waste no time, straight gettin' low
Started strippin' clothez off like a centerfold
Talkin' 'bout "Hammel go hard" like I didn't know
Now we in the zone, yeah we finna bone
This chick blowin' on my dick like a piccolo
Flip her over and stick her in the figure-four
Hit her with a load, said she couldn't take anymore
That SuperSnake sneak out at nighttime
To skeet webz and fight crime
Rapperz cain't write rhymez like mine
I'm a god damned muzik Einstein
You foolz ain't fillin' my shoez
I don't care if they super-size you
You 5'2” and I'm huge, you tryin' to fight who?
That'z suicide, dude!

'Cauze ain't nobody touchin' H-A double-M-E-L
'cept for them freaky femalez
My LPz sellz out the retail chainz
Gettin' more spinz than Sprewellz
She sellz seashellz, a tounge-twister
Listen up mister, better come get your
Little young sister 'fore I done sticked her
I'm just havin' fun wit'cha
I'm gettin' hungry, it'z time to eat a
Cheezy MC like a slice of pizza
Now say hi to the bad guy (Okay?)
And my little friend, yeah, nice to meet ya!
Every line iz ether
I'm rappin' lapz around catz in flyest sneakerz
It'z like this: Hammel'z the shit
And y'all just diarrhea
See ya!


from Blonde Bomber: The Mixtape, released November 9, 2016


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LAZËR Dallas, Texas

Most Danger Band on the Planet.

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